Parenting Tip # 14 Bullying is an Acceptable Behavior

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My child was raised to never tell a lie so when my child says your child is fat, stupid, or ugly, well then I will have to take their word for it. Bullying is a way of life, besides where did they learn this type of behavior, well not from daddy, I try to be an absent father. But they watch enough movies to see what bullying is and if my child is the one bullying and your child is the one crying then what’s the problem. When you receive a phone call from a parent that tries to place the blame on your child it is important to shout profanity at them and say that your child is perfect and maybe you should take my child’s advice. If your child is fat put them on a diet, if the child is stupid get them Sylvan Learning Center, if your child is ugly get them plastic surgery. Then shrug it off and say kids will be kids, they are just sowing their wild oats. Of course this advice is if your child is the one bullying. If your child is the one being bullied you need to call the School Board right away this behavior is unacceptable and the child needs to be expelled at all cost (even and including having your child place drugs in their locker).

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9 Comments

Filed under comedy, family, funny, humor, Parenting

9 responses to “Parenting Tip # 14 Bullying is an Acceptable Behavior

  1. I truly like your sense of humor. I’ve got five kids of my own, ranging in age from 26 to 8, and also six grandkids. My middle daughter was/is a very young parent like you – she is 22 and has three, ranging in age from 6 mos. to 6 years. Child/parenting humor is mandatory in our house! Keep in touch (I feel you pain!)

  2. Once those wild oats are sewn together, do they get sowed as a sweater?

  3. Seth

    These are all fantastic sitcom ideas. You should copyright this stuff right away!

  4. eatone

    Agreed. In life, there are winners and losers. Social darwinism should be taught in school. It would make my life MUCH easier if I could tell the dumb kids to just drop out and do everyone else a favor, especially the kids who will end up being doctors one day. We need drop outs and drug dealers because we need cops….etc. This machine wouldn’t work without each cog/transgression.

    http://eatabigone.wordpress.com/

  5. lviss

    YOU CAN ALSO TEACH THE KID HOW TO PINCH THE KID STANDING NEXT TO HIM OR SOMEBODY IN A Q IN A MALL WITHOUT OTHERS NOTICING IT.

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